Tuesday, 26 November 2013

LOVING MYSELF




The other day, I was having a ‘moment’. I have this huge mirror on my dresser, and as I was getting dressed, I was standing in front of it. I remarked to myself that my skin felt really soft, then my eyes caught sight of my reflection in the mirror. And I was really happy with what I saw. I smiled at myself, took a few moments to take in that happy feeling, and then kept it moving.

Its important to note to you that I’m not perfect. I have stretch marks, rolls of body fat, acne scars. But I love my body. The more I take the time to love it, the better I feel about myself and the more I enjoy the person I’m growing into. I don’t just love my body when I’m wearing a fly outfit or some Spanxx. I love it when I’m naked, when I’m clothed, when I’m laying in bed and even when I feel kinda fat. I love exactly what I have and even though it’d be nice to have a flatter stomach, I don’t beat myself up about it. I have strengths and weaknesses just like every other woman but this bundle of flesh is uniquely my own.

Getting older is allot of fun. I didn't anticipate enjoying my days this much. One reason I looked forward to turning 30 was gaining the strong sense of self that older women seem to have. I've never seen a friend who’s over 30 apologize for who she is, what she wants and the choices she’s made. I didn't really understand what it means to love yourself until I stopped comparing myself to others, stopped reaching for some ideal of what I should be or what I should look like, and just appreciated who I am, what I like and my potential as it stands.

Yeah, I’m feeling’ myself, and I hope you’re feeling’ yourself too. We’re wonderful, beautiful beings with the chance to have, be or do anything. Doesn't that just make you feel good?

Tuesday, 12 November 2013

HOLDING OUR SELVES BACK ....






I am familiar with what it takes to start a business But that doesn't mean I’m immune to the fear, self-doubt and worry that can come along when you put yourself and your ideas out there.

Sometimes you can get so paralyzed by the fear that other people will tell you ‘no’, that you don’t even put yourself in the game. And that’s really sad.

Because that is simply confusing one person’s opinion with your worth. For example, if someone looks at one of my shirts and doesn't like them, I've come to learn that that’s just their opinion  their opinion isn't a measure of what my business or my product is worth. Just as someone’s good opinion isn't a measure of worth for me. Ultimately, I set my own worth  my opinion is the only one that truly matters.

I've found that we limit ourselves in alot of ways because we seek outside approval. I think this is caused by being attached to the outcome of what we do. It’s not enough for us to start a business and do something we love – if other people don’t validate our worth, then we tell ourselves that we’re not good enough.

Here are four ways entrepreneurs hold themselves back, and strategies to get around them:

1) Second-guessing expertise

People assume that in order to be an expert at something, you have to have credentials and years of experience. That is a false assumption. Expertise simply means that you know more than another person, and have something of value to offer in that area.

How to get out of this mindset: realize that what you know, right now, is enough. If you’re passionate about your niche and invest time in educating yourself, you've already attained a level sufficient to market yourself. That doesn't mean you stop learning and growing – that just means that you stop putting off starting your business until you learn more. Because you’re setting yourself up for failure that way. You’ll never know enough, you’ll keep changing your minimum requirement to start, and opening day will never arrive for you.

Start exactly where you are. No more delay.


2) Shy away from sales

If you’re providing something of value, you deserve to be compensated. It’s not free for you to make your products and the time you give when you provide your serve is valuable also. Plus people put more value into what they pay to receive – how many free eBooks have you downloaded but never read?

How to get out of this mindset: if you don’t get paid for what you do, then it’s either a hobby or volunteer work. This is another area where you have to work to detach from outcomes and not see someone’s opinion as your worth. Some people will not pay, regardless of how low the price is. You just have to go where there are paying customers who want what you’re providing.

You should also spend time learning how to make sales and how marketing is integral to any business. That will alleviate some of your anxiety and inexperience with generating sales for your business. Don’t go in blind like I did – make this a part of your pre-launch research, or if you've already started your business, make sure you regularly study sales and marketing techniques.

3) Support the wrong people

It’s a beautiful thing to support a minority-owned business, especially if you’re a part of that minority group. You feel great for supporting businesses with missions that align with your own. But I've seen business owners that don’t appreciate my help and take my business for granted. I've also seen where entrepreneurs I know reach out to black business owners, and get burned for their efforts.


How to get out of this mindset:supporting minorities is awesome, if it’s what you believe in. But you shouldn't drag your business down in the process. Only support those who've shown that they’ll maximize the value of your time and money, regardless of skin color or nationality.

4) Waiting for the perfect time

When exactly is the perfect time to start a business? Is it after you've found all the investors you need? The perfect commercial space? After you've become more of an expert than you already are? How about after things die down at work, or your kids are done with school?


There is no perfect time. The time is now. That’s the only time you have, and the only time that exists. You can’t act in the future, you can’t act in the past. You can only act right now.


While you wait for things to get less hectic, or less whatever it is you’re waiting for, things could go in the opposite direction.

How to get out of this mindset: realize that there’s no perfect time. Perfection doesn't exist. The planets aren't going to align in the exact way you need so that things will be easy for you. While you delay, others are making money doing what you could be doing.

You can’t know everything you need to know or do everything you need to do before you start, because there’s always something else. The beauty of running your own business is that you run it, so you control the pace. Once you’re up and running you can add the skills, resources, people and other things you need for your business, but it’s best to actually be up to attract those things to you.

You are the only thing standing in your way. I hope you see that with a few tweaks of your mindset, you can launch yourself on the path to your goals. So what are you waiting for?

been speaking to a few friends about their businesses just to let you know fear will always be there getting up every day wishing you did something then years later you realize you 40 and counting will hurt you stop wishing and start doing .... its never to late in business but start earning and be passionate about what you want to do and wake up and do ...or call me 
Business Adviser for small businesses

Sunday, 10 November 2013

TIME IS MONEY



The longer you wait to start your business, the longer it’ll take to make it profitable. And the longer it’ll take for you to make the money you deserve. You’re basically flushing money down the toilet by wasting time  on your dream.


In How to Get Rich, Felix Dennis wrote about how, in the late 70s, he listened to a trusted older man when he wanted advice on starting a computer magazine. His friend told him that no one was interested in a magazine about computers. Dennis listened but still held on to his passion. It turns out that someone else started the magazine, and Dennis ended up paying $1 million to buy a majority stake in the magazine.
If he had started the magazine when he first got the idea, saved the $1 million that he paid to buy out the original owner, and invested it, he’d be $10 million richer from that one idea. You never thought a delay could be so costly, did you?

Neither did I, but that goes to show that we never know how much our delays truly cost us… “time is money” is really an understatement.

One of the best reasons for acting TODAY is that your dream doesn't have an unlimited shelf life. It’s upsetting to have a dream to work toward, but after a while your enthusiasm will naturally die. If you don’t at least begin your work and nurture your dream with action, it’ll remain a thought in your head with nothing to show that it existed.


How many times have you had a dream, something you were really passionate about, but others didn't feel the same? And no matter how much you talked about it or thought about it, somehow it fell of the raider and never happened. That didn't mean you lost your passion, but it died a natural death. The only way to prevent that from happening is to let your dream take flight.

If not now, when? If not you, who?